My 101: #55 Write a Short Story

Yeah I know I know, My 101 in 1001 is said and done; but as I said HERE and HERE, I did complete another goal but lost (temporarily misplaced) the original piece. Which is what brings me here today, I am proud of myself and the fact that I was able to attain some (more than half) of the goals I set for myself. And I also found the short story I wrote, dated February 28th, 2008, which was within my time frame.

Beautiful as the Day I First Saw Her

I wasn't more than 19 years old the first time I saw her...

A friend of mine had been talking about her for quite some time. He'd go on and on about how I needed to see her. At that time I wasn't really looking for anything so my interest wasn't much.

Eventually we took a trip to see her...

From the moment she caught my eyes I knew she had to be mine. Never before had I seen anything created with such perfection and beauty. Dressed in red with black shoes and curves that cut through me with spine tingling force.

I knew she was older than me but that never really mattered...

She was mine and I was hers. Friends and family could never understand what we had. When I spoke of her and my time with her they couldn't comprehend the joys we experienced. It wasn't long before I knew I had to share my experiences with others that didn't understand. We'd go on drives and share moments with each other.

Our days together were more than I could have ever imagined...

Soon I began to invite friends and family to share time with us and it wasn't long before everyone began to realize that what we had was more than a dream. We'd drive to the coast, sit on the hood as we listened to the waves crash onto the beach... Some days were so long that they turned to night and we'd stare up at the sky mesmerized by the stars and wishing endlessly.

I wouldn't even let her walk over a puddle...

It was autumn and the night came fast, as it usually does when we're lost in ourselves. Storm clouds began to form as the winds wickedly blew in. It wasn't long before the rain began; harder and harder the sky began to fall as the night screamed. A winding road is no place for a love like this on a night like this. My vision is blurred and I'm dying to get away... Lightning blasts a tree ahead of me, so close I can't see... Screeching tires is the last thing I hear.

Alone I wake in the hospital...

I ask the nurse, where is she? Confused she responds "I'm sorry but who are you talking about?" My head crashes softly back into the pillow as I fall silent.

It wasn't until I was released that I realized her fate...

My father picked me up from the hospital. Without even speaking he knew what I was thinking. And before I said a word he answered "It's not good" as we drove to see her. When we finally arrived I saw the truth of my fathers words... She was gone, a part of me was lost too. Never in my life had I felt this way. Her final image remains the same but to me she is and will always be as beautiful as the day I first saw her.  I will never forget that 1969.

101 in 1001... The End

For those of you following and or keeping track, my 101 things to do in 1001 days ends today and with pretty good success. If I say so myself. Although I didn't complete every single goal I set out for myself, I feel accomplished. What started in November of 2007 has just ended July 2010.

Highlights (In order from 1 - 101):

#15. Get a New Tattoo - This was a busy Valentines Day for The Wife and I but we both got some good ink and had a great day.

#25. Get Healthy (Diet & Exercise) - I started P90X in March of 2009 and completed in 3 months later. I took a couple of weeks off then started a modified version for about 2 months. Probably the fittest I had been in 10 years.

#26. Have a Child - I've never known love like I now know love. My life is better with my son in it.

#35. Learn How to Grill Ribs - Mmmm, Baby Backs. Ask The Wife, they were damn good.

#82. Enjoy a REAL Massage - I had never had one before but now I'm hooked.

Lowlights:

#7. Finally go on Honeymoon - And the winning lotto number is... Guess I need to play lotto for that to really matter.

#39. Host an Outdoor Movie Night - Since before I was a homeowner I've always wanted to host an outdoor movie night and thought that within 1001 days I would have done that. Nope. That gear costs some coin, maybe in my next 1001 days.

#44. Make a Damn Good Pomarita - Why haven't I done this yet?!

#51. Skydive - If you've got a plane and will let me fall out of it, call me.

#55. Write a Short Story - I wrote one but somehow lost it. True story.

My 101

Well if you look at the counter above, time is about to expire on me and my list. Well not me, I'm not dying and if I was a counter on my life would just be creepy. With that said, I think I did a pretty good job in completing almost half of my list. Some were fun, dumb, exhausting, educational, healthy and even life changing. Below is what's left to and/or wasn't done.

5. Change light bulbs: (To more efficient bulbs) Uhh, we’ve lived in our house for about 4 years and we haven’t had to change a bulb yet.
6. Sign a hobo: I gave up on this.
7. Finally go on honeymoon: We WISH.
9. Visit Grandma and Grandpa: I missed too many opportunities to visit Grandma and fear that I’m doing the same with Grandpa. In my defense, my calls often go unanswered or returned.
16. Do one new thing a month: I’m sure I’ve done a few new things since this began but I haven’t kept track.
17. Learn a full song on the guitar: If it takes time and effort… I’m out.
22. Write an original song: I think this takes talent, scratch that, I’ve heard the state of pop music today… I guess I need a few hours, a beat machine, sub par dance lyrics, boobs and blonde hair.
23. Get a bike (Haro) ride it: I am now waiting on Lil Money.
27. Acquire a new digital camera: I think we’ve been through this.
28. Take a year’s worth of pictures: Working on it.
29. Visit at LEAST one new place in the U.S.: By this I meant city or state which hasn’t happened, but I went to Don Darios this weekend and it was pretty good.
30. Take more pictures of our house and yard: Ehh, nothing worth documenting. We did lose a tree this season though.
31. Fly a balloon with a note of my 101: Time is about to expire on my list, too late.
32. Buy a CD a Month & write a review: Nah.
39. Host an outdoor movie night: Need a projector and screen, kinda thought I’d have one by now.
40. Host a Halloween party: I think I’ve grown out of this idea.
41. Find a new swimming hole: 5 mile dam.
44. Make a damn good pomarita: Mmm, I might have to do this soon.
46. Bathe cats: It’s a battle that hasn’t recently been conquered… Actually, The Wife did recently bathe Mia (The easy one).
47. Keep records of yard work: We just do it and call it a day.
48. Maintain a Bonsai: Didn’t even try, I have a way with either letting them die or killing them.
49. Bowl with friends/family (150 game): I know I had a couple of good games in March but I’m not sure if I made the 150 mark.
51. Skydive: Crystal, when are we going to finally fall out of a plane?
53: Walk more: What was I thinking when I wrote this, am I a senior citizen, all I do is walk.
55. Write a short story: I wrote one but lost it, true story.
56. Send post cards whenever possible: Really I haven’t gone anywhere; well I did go to Don Darios recently.
57. Work a full week with no personal internet: But how will I blog? When will I find time to read the 94 blogs I follow?
58. Picnic in the park: When the weather is cooler The Wife, Lil Money and I will most definitely get on this.
59. Go skinny dipping: When appropriate.
62. Learn – Crank Dat Soulja Boy: I think I learned it in my head, good enough.
63. Learn how to C-Walk: Still want to do this.
64. Hold my own sign for 15 minutes: Nope.
66. Write my own joke: Cricket… cricket…
67. Carry a pocket sized note pad: In case I’m involved in an intriguing impromptu interview?
69. Purchase my favorite Disney movies: Stupid vault!
70. Make my own beer: I need to add a kit to my wish list.
71. Make my own shirt: I’m with lazy. Lazy is wearing me. (In other words, hasn’t happened yet).
74. Write a Haiku a week: A haiku a week / I’m admittedly lazy / this haiku is weak.
75. Make a soundtrack of my life: I think of this all the time and haven’t done it.
76. Buy a Bible and read it: Maybe I’ll go to church and “borrow” one… I’ll be forgiven.
78. Ride a train anywhere: What, am I hobo?
79. Buy gifts all year long: Who does that?
81: Enjoy my backyard with my wife: F that, it’s much cooler inside on the couch watching House Hunters.
85. Draw more: I draw a bath for Lil Money every night.
86. Have another “Super Saturday”: Since the first and only one, another has yet to happen.
87. Go to a movie alone: I have too many on Netflix to watch.
88. Learn more about Mexican culture: America doesn’t want them here.
89. Learn about African American Culture: America wishes they never brought them.
90. Learn Spanish: It’s a shame that I don’t already know it.
93. Save a quarter: I have a ton, but I spent them all on Mocha Frappe’s. Damn you McDonalds and your empty flavorful calories.
98. Pedicure, manicure twice a year: let me just say that my game isn’t quite up to par.
99. Have lunch/dinner with The Cohens: We’ve been slacking on this.
100. Date night with Crystal: It’s a shame that this doesn’t happen.
101. Start a new list: Not for a while.

35. Learn How to Grill Ribs

I woke up bright and early at nine in the morning. Okay, that may not be “bright and early” but I’m still fresh to fatherhood and this uninterrupted sleep thing still has its hold on me. Besides I was my mom’s house late sipping some vino and playing games.

Where was I? Oh yeah, bright and early… The Wife and Lil Money were still in dreamland. I tip toed out of bed and into the kitchen. Poured myself and nice glass of orange juice, pulp in, and went out back. As I shut the refrigerator door I could smell the mouth-watering aroma of baby backs that had been rubbed in the Good Shit. More on that later.

Texas mornings are cool but not the kinda cool where a light sweater is called for the kinda cool where you can feel moisture in the air. Yeah! So no time to waste. I began by prepping the grill, ridding it of day’s past of dusty charcoal and pecan wood. Once I had that squared away it was time to light the fire. Thanks to my brother David, I have an awesome new chimney starter that worked solidly. I loaded it up with mesquite and it began to burn right away, just the smell of the wood was enough trigger hunger pangs.

Once the chips were hot and glowing I dumped them over to one side of the grill and let them “cool” to a white ash. On the other half of the grill I put a bread pan with hot water (to maintain moisture in the grill while smoking). I put the top grill on, cleaned it and let it heat up.

It’s about ten o’clock now and time to put my Bar B Q’ing skills to the test. Note: this will be my first attempt at baby back ribs. So I pull the ribs out of the fridge, and dayamn they smell good. Thanks to a buddy of mine, Eli, I have some spice and Bar B Q sauce that he not only recommended but also provided. So the Good Shit covered ribs make their way out back and as they hit the grill I hear the coveted sizzle, this is gonna be a good day. I adjust the air intake and put the lid on the grill. And smoke away.

30 minutes later I check the status of the grill, gotta keep the heat just right and make sure it’s smoking. To my disappointment the mesquite chips aren’t maintaining enough heat, the meat is visibly being cooked but the temperature isn’t near what I think it should be. Lucky for me, my brospeh Joseph, cut a huge pecan tree from his backyard a season ago so I was stocked. I tossed a small log into the charred coals and… We have fire! I closed the lid again to cut airflow and it began smoking.

2 patient hours later, I return with Corky’s Bar B Que sauce, thanks again Eli, anxiously waiting to glaze these bad boys. The meat’s tender, with good, ready to eat color and as I grab them with the tongs I can tell the meat just wants to fall off the bone. Let the glazing begin and in 30 minutes we should be ready to eat.

And 30 minutes later, they were indeed ready to eat. Now, as I’ve said here before, I don’t have a camera so I didn’t capture any images of the process or ribs… Honestly I didn’t even think about pictures until I had already cut the ribs. By that time The Wife and I were ready to get our grub on. We plated up, with corn on the cob and baked beans. And if I say so myself, these were some DAMN GOOD ribs.

My 101: Doin it

#27. Acquire a new Digital Camera
Shiet… I’d take a used one if it worked. New or used would be nice, with Lil’ Money I we just don’t have that kinda Cash at the moment. Pft, and when I do have extra coin, I usually spend it before considering saving it. Whata-ya-gonna-do?

#28. Take a year's worth of pictures
… Has now, rather, will be titled A Year as Dad. Ha, dad, a word I’ve not said many times in my life and although unfamiliar, I like the sound of it when it comes to me. Anyhow, it is what it is, just me sitting at the desk of my computer and taking a daily snapshot of myself. At the end of a year I plan on putting all the captured shots together with some cool music… Stay tuned.

#30. Take more pictures of our house and yard
See #27… Or will someone please buy me a camera? Kidding. But for real. Here’s a recent shot that The Wife took, check out that green, noice.

#31. Fly a balloon with a note attached of my 101
Something that I thought would be a cool idea, fly a balloon with a note and wait… to see if anyone finds it after it lands and checks out the blog. While this is probably one of the easiest items on my list, I still have yet to get it done. Simply put, I’m lazy and besides it’s not like I’ve got balloons, string and helium stocked at the house. Yeah, that’s my story.

#32. Buy a CD a month and write a review
I love music, new and old, loud and soft, the emotion it gives me is like no other and as much as I’d like to up my stock of music it’s just not going to happen. Yeah, albums cost anywhere from $9 - $20+ and that’s not much when you consider it as only a monthly purchase, but as I mentioned before when I do have coin to spend I spend it and recently I’ve been on a tie kick. Besides, I read what I write and I know that I can not even begin to articulate my feelings, thoughts and ideas music gives me. I like what I like and from time to time I share those pieces with you here on the blog.

#34 Learn to cook shrimp
No apologies for the following… But the fuck faces of BP may be ruining the quality of seafood in my area for years in the Gulf Coast. The impact won’t even be truly known for years because there just isn’t a baseline for what’s going on today. Just thinking about shrimp and seafood in general pisses me off because it creates images of the suffering wildlife and the poisoning of the shores on the coastline.

#35 Learn how to grill ribs
Baby backs to be specific. Mmmm Ribs. I told a buddy that I was planning on trying my hand at grilling some baby backs and he provided me with some Corcky’s Memphis Bar-B-Que sauce, now I just need to get some rub and ribs and get to grilling. Stay tuned, it will be done. And I can’t wait.

#28. Take a Year’s Worth of Pictures

Since the life changing event of #26, I have officially started taking daily snapshots of myself. My original goal was to have this accomplished before my 1001 days were done but I just never kept up with it. I’d start, capture a few shots then completely abandon it. That happened more times than I’d like to admit.

But without accomplishing #27, Acquire a New Digital Camera, this task was a bit more difficult that I imagined it would be. The Wife has a camera I can use but it’s really not choice to have to share someone’s camera. I’d hate to have to remove images she has stored, besides we have different interests and ideas so one camera can’t fulfill our needs.

Enough about that though… Now, I just take a seat at home and shoot myself –yeah right in the face!- photo booth style. A handy application that serves its purpose flawlessly for this project. This project will probably capture tired eyes and the wrinkles on my face as I rapidly age with fatherhood, haha, kidding. I expect fatherhood will keep me young.

When I’ve finally captured a year’s worth of images I hope to make a short “stop motion” type film with clever music edited in. Until then, best of luck to you with all of your goals, thanks for visiting and stay tuned for my short “film”… Hopefully posted sometime in March of 2011.

#26. Have a Child

On March 8th 2010 at 9:53pm all the Cash I will ever need made his world debut. The little guy was already doing his best Dad impersonation weighing in at 5.97lbs. From the moment I first saw him, I knew I loved him. My life will never be the same again, he will make me a better person and man. I am excited for the experiences we will share and our lives together.


[Editor’s Note]: It was recommended many times during the pregnancy to get all the sleep that we can and to get used to losing sleep. What those many folks failed to mention was that there would be nights where we’d get absolutely no sleep.

With that said, I’d like to thank The Wife for her strength, patience, determination and love in caring for our son at night (And day) while I get sleep for the grind and while I am at work. I love you and have always known that you will be a great mother. Myself and our son are lucky to have you in our lives.

[Second Note]: In regular DY fashion I preferably wrote the original #26 post in a spiral and due to edits and personal taste that 3 page experiences from home to hospital to birth didn’t make the post. But this post captures in short my emotions of my new life.

My 101: Doin It

# 25 Get Healthy (Diet and Exercise)

On March 2nd 2009 I started The P90X workout. And let me just say, dayamn, I was not prepared for the high intensity of this program. The first week was K-I-L-L-E-R! Never in my life have I had to cut short any physical activity due to physical exhaustion but this program nearly brought me to my knees in the first week. I almost lost my lunch, my body was aching and I was getting dizzy. And I enjoyed it, I knew those were signs that my physicality was waining and I needed a swift kick in the ass.

I was also pretty excited about the diet, the program came with a couple of informative books, one of which was a nutritional guide. When people see me and/or hear me talk about dieting they get the misconception that diet means that I am trying to cut calories and lose weight. But that isn't what diet means. I have never officially been on a diet although I've always been aware of what I eat and try to maintain a healthy diet. With the P90X Nutritional guide I was given so much information on what to eat and how much to eat. Now, I didn't follow my plan exactly mostly because it was difficult with my schedule and The Wife's, Friends & Families eating habits. I'm also not calling anyone out or throwing anyone under the bus, but when families have gatherings a feast is bound to happen and I am bound to partake. However, I did eat as good as I could and I was serious about not eating anything bad most of the time. I also rarely drank alcohol, maybe a beer or two or a Bloody Mary but nothing like I was used to.

# 95 Crunches At Least 3 Sets

I did a ridiculous amount of crunches during the P90X program. I don't know the exact number but trust me, it was a lot.

#96 Push Ups At least 3 Sets

... Every other day. This didn't go quite as planned but when I started this list I wasn't aware of The P90x program. I know I was working at this before I started the program but while on the program I knocked out 1,350 in 19 days. That's about 71/day and I'm satisfied with that.

# 97 Buy and USE a Pullup Bar

During the program I did pullups only 18 days, I skipped some days , once because I was sick and another because my left wrist was killing me and I couldn't lift myself. But during those 18 days I did 907, about 50/day.

It's been almost a year since I started the program and I'm really disappointed in myself for not keeping it going. Like Tony Horton says, "Do you best and forget the rest". "Bring It!"

For those of you familiar with the program, yes I do have before and after pictures but the aesthetic results don't really show as much as the way I felt after the program. After the and even during the program I felt stronger and my endurance was better but pictures don't capture that.

My 101: Doin it.

#33. Plant a Tree Anywhere.
After the Christmas of 2008 I took our tree to Zilker Park to be turned into mulch. In turn they gave me a little tree to plant. I was excited about this because I love planting trees and watching them grow, just awesome. I found a nice big pot, got some soil and planted that bad boy. It was doing so good for a few months. I knew the summer heat would beat it down so I kept it near the shadows of my fence to ease the heat. I kept up with the watering but the extreme drought of 2009 took another victim… along with the rest of the plants and flowers in our backyard. All except the few cacti I’ve obtained.

But, The City of Austin gave my Broseph, Joseph, a few trees and he said he’d give me one or two, all I have to do is pick them up. They were potted I just hope the winter freeze didn’t kill’em.

#42. Blog About My Success and/or Failure.
Here I am, proudly inching away at this list. Of all the people I know who started the list I am the only one who’s kept up with it. Although, many of them have actually become more apart of the blogging community than I have.

#43. Grow and Give Away a Plant.
My original intention was to grow a plant from a seed and give it away. So far the seeds I’ve started haven’t made it very far along. They start out promising but for some reason beyond me just stop growing. Actually, I had some seeds start sprouting just before winter which I thought was weird, they were doing surprisingly great. That is, until we got our first freeze.

Anyhow, what I ended up doing was growing an Ivy clipping and gave it to my cuzin (yeah cuzin) Brad. At my last job my desk was perfectly situated in front of a floor to ceiling window so I had a lot of plants in my area. I also drank a lot of green tea, so I decided to conduct an experiment to see which plants would grow better. I had three different clippings; one growing in a cup of water, one in equal parts water and green tea and another in green tea. Of course the one in water grew. The one in equal parts was slightly more vibrant in green with bigger leaves and the third, which was only in green tea grew moldy but with dark green leaves. Other than the mold in the water the ivy itself was, as far as I could tell perfectly fine.

#45. Play in at Least One Poker Tournament.
I played in the 2009 World Series of Poker (WSOP) in Las Vegas. Nah, no I didn’t, but it would be a lot cooler if I did. I do however, play in a monthly poker game with a few folks and I’m getting my game up to par. In the last two months I have stopped drinking during the games and have walked away with money in my pocket, that’s what I’m talking about.

#52. Go Six Straight Months without Credit Card Use.
I killed it. I started this list in November of 2007 and since then I haven’t used a credit card. Now if I can just pay those motha’s off. Damn my youthful ignorance in borrow-spending.

#57 Work a Full week without Personal Internet.

Never gonna happen. As long as I'm a citizen... Scratch that, victim, of office life I will always use the world wide interwebs.

#60. Win a Contest.
This (2009) football season I play Fantasy Football with MamaWanda & Clonda and their crew. This was my first time ever playing fantasy sports and I really got down on it. Everyone could tell I was a rookie because on draft day my style was way different than everyone else’s. While everyone was using there first picks on Running Back I started off mine with a QB-WR duo in Kurt Warner and Larry Fitzgerald. Then followed those picks with Eli Manning. My Running Backs were sub-par but Ricky Williams kept me in the mix. And at the end of the first part of the season I finished in 2nd place. Making my pockets fat. J Adding to those winnings I started the next half of the season with a win. Can’t wait for next season.

#50. Run in the Next Schlotzsky's Bun Run

Better late than never I suppose. I just recieved an email from The Young Business Men's League of Austin (YMBL), it's that time of year again. Time for all of Austin's 5k's, 10k's and what have you. I say what have you because there are also adventure races and high intensity races in this town. I have only taken part in the Schlotzsky's Bun Run and this year marks the 28th annual race, an Austin tradition since 1982. No. I haven't been running it that long I have only run the race a few times but enjoy myself everytime I have.

This year I doubt I'll be racing, The Wife and I are coming down to the final stretch of her pregnancy. Ha, I say "I" as if I am pregnant. But, Lil Cash will be here at any moment, hopefully right around the time the race is going. While I'm here, I decided I'll post pictures from last season's race, I didn't write up a post then so now seems like a good time.

My time wasn't nearly as good as I hoped it would be, but good enough for me. I had only been working out solidldy for 3 months at the time of the race. Before that, I wasn't quite as active as I should have been.

Check out that stride, and that boy rocking the South Austin T. That's how I roll, oh yeah, I remember I had to make a couple of pit stops. My knee was aching so I had to adjust my knee strap and natured called, what-a-ya-gonna-do? Number one.

Photo Credit: Kreutz Photography
Wanna Race?: Schlotzsky's Bun Run

#24. Keep Family Tree Up-To-Date

Maintaining the Family Tree is extremely important to me, I only know who I am and where I personally come from. But when it comes to the bigger picture I know absolutely nothing. I decided a few years ago that I’d start a tree on Ancestry.com in hopes of finding out more about my family as well as extended members. I also hoped for more involvement or input from other members. But, I started this project and I should own up to it.

Fortunately for me, my current job affords me the opportunity to verify certain information from records that directly influences my tree. Unfortunately, I have found discrepancies that make this project’s maintenance a little more difficult. I knew this wasn’t going to be easy and I look forward to the many challenges and changes as our family continues to grow.

I don’t know much about where I come from and may not know where we are going, but I am thankful to be apart of it. I encourage you to take a look at the bigger picture of you and your family, you never know what you’ll learn.

#23. Get a Bike (Haro) and Ride it

Well this hasn’t happened yet and it probably wont happen any time soon. As some of you know The Wife and I are expecting our first child. We’re actually rounding the final stretch of things and (She’s) hoping for an early March arrival. Guess we’ll have to wait and see.

Even though Cash hasn’t made his much anticipated debut I’m still looking ahead to things to come. Biking is definitely on the list of things to do. I remember good times riding bikes with my brother and friends at The Pit. This place was AWESOME -I wonder if it’s still there. We lived in the hood and the pit was actually some abandoned undeveloped piece of land where kids would rally and dirt bikes would growl & fly by. It was a sweet spot for boys who loved riding; we’d take our bikes on sweet jumps, ride along the walls of the pit and race through creeks and trails. Good times. Writing this brings it all back, I really miss riding. I might have to take a trip to the old hood to see if this place still exists, I don’t have a bike but I’ll take some pictures if I can. The No Trespassing sign never stopped me/us before.

Some of my friends had mountain bikes while others had BMX's but I had a Chrome Schwinn frame. Which in it’s day was probably a killer ride, but for me it was just a frame hand-me-down. Did that stop me, NO and it never will. I hooked that beast up with a regular size black tire in the back and a kids-size red tire on the front. Yeah, that’s how I roll, well how I rolled. You best believe I got down with the best of them.

While I really didn’t have a problem with that bike, I fully intend on getting my son a sweet bike that he can proudly roll around the neighborhood on. I’ve wanted a specific type of bike for a while and why not try to find cash one too. Check the pics below for some sweet bikes.

Cash Options:

-Haro Z10 - A perfect bike for the begining rider. Has a parental grip on the back of the seat for training.

My Options:

-Haro Forum Pro Lite - Out of my price range (now) but maybe when it comes time to purchasing one I can get down on it.

-Haro Flightline 20 - A more rugged and affordable setup.

#14. Finish Several Books I've Started - Choke by Chuck Palahniuk

Choke by Chuck Palahniuk

Synopsis:
Victor Mancini, a medical-school dropout, is an antihero for our deranged times. Needing to pay elder care for his mother, Victor has devised an ingenious scam: he pretends to choke on pieces of food while dining in upscale restaurants.

This 304 page book took me far longer than it really should have. My brother lent me the book and said he read through it quickly so I thought I'd do the same. When I first opened it I read page after page after page, from the very beginning the author's style had my attention. I never thought I'd put it down but of course distraction and pure laziness took it's choke hold on me.

When I finally picked it up again I killed it in two day's (during lunch) at work. While not as exciting as Fight Club, for me, Choke still has all the twists and turns you expect from Chuck Palahniuk. Upon finishing the book I Netflixed the movie to get the cinematic point of view, all in all, book and film they were alright.

Austin to Yoakum and Back Again + #37. Travel to a Small Texas Town

Another gray sky day, the temperatures balanced between 32 – 35 degrees as we traveled from Southwest Austin to Yoakum, Texas. Early Sunday morning Crystal’s mom, aunt and I along with Maggie, their dog, loaded up and headed out to the Leather Capital of Texas so they could meet the new dog they planned on adopting.

The trip was long, probably not as long as it seemed because we traveled along untouched Texas land. Living in a city where construction is endless with new buildings piercing the sky everyday and endless roads running every which way. It’s hard to believe that there are actually parts of Texas that are virtually untouched as far as the eye can see. A reminder of why I am grateful to have been born and live in this great state. The reminders were not far and between on our way… Just when the open land merged with a small town we came up on a Trail Ride, a scene that being from Texas you would have imagined I’d seen before but, nope, not once. It was very cool to see so many people riding horses and so many different kinds of horses pulling carriages. I tried to take pictures but the shit-ass camera on my HTC MyTouch is less than sub-par (But that’s a subject for another rant). The coolest sight I saw several times on our way were horses, Cows, Calves and Longhorns running wild on open land. Just witnessing that was amazing to me. I’m a big Nat-Geo, Discovery fan so for me watching those animals run free was like being apart of Planet Earth. Very cool!

We finally made our way into Yoakum and as we pulled up to the house there was a life size steel horse roped up in the front yard. My initial thought was, “I came all this way and I feel like I’m in South Austin”. We were greeted by Mr. Scott and walked into his home, it looked small and had that nostalgic old wooden smell I can only remember from my Great Grandmothers house. He escorted us back, from one room to another and I quickly realized that this house that looked small from the outside was as endless as Texas skies. The inside of his house had relic antique furniture, paintings on the wall and all sorts of antique figurines and phones. We were finally seated in his living room, oh and he had flat screen televisions everywhere. What does one man need with so many televisions? Anyhow we were finally seated in his living room I had no idea what seats were made for sitting and which were just decoration (There were about 13 pieces of furniture in his living room), but as I was about to sit down I was quickly told to jump into another seat. Haha. The seat that he pointed out for me was a big comfortable recliner, so big that I had to jump into it cause my feet couldn’t reach the ground.


Mr. Scott discussed with us the history and training of Skunky, the soon to be adopted Border Collie and you could tell how much he loved her. His choice of words made it hard for me knowing that he would soon be without her. He referred to her as darling and you could sense that he often spoke to her in baby-talk. He then stood up and asked us outside so we could all meet Skunky, I jumped off of the couch and landed safely on the wood floors and walked out back. There she was, this well trained excited Skunky. He called her and instructed her to sit, lay, then rollover and she listened. His next command “Get in the truck” and she leaped up and scaled the closed gate of his pick up and seated her self calmly in the bed of his truck. “Out the truck” he said and again she obliged. “In you chair” and she raced and jumped into what is obviously her designated lawn chair. I knew instantly that Wanda and Clonda had already made up their mind that she would be a new member of their household.

The decision was made and Mr. Scott gave his last goodbyes assuring Skunky that she was going to be happy in her new home and instructing her to listen to her new family. He walked us out and saw her into the vehicle and bid her farewell. From Yoakum to Austin this small town dog is moving to the “big city”, her new home.

*The photos are from Google Search... Remember my camera phone is a "piece".

#83. Post Another (QUALITY) Video On YouTube

I don't know if this really should be considered "quality" but I does make me laugh. :)

#83. Post Another (QUALITY) Video On YouTube

#83. Post Another (QUALITY) Video On YouTube

#4. Start Recycling

This one took some time to actively happen... Not due to lack of effort, because I did save cans. Cans that started to overflow cause I never did anything with them. but hey that beats tossing them out just to take up space in a landfill somewhere right?

I can't remember, but at some point... Let's say early 2009 our neighborhood's garbage disposal service FINALLY offered weekly recycling pick up. Something I had looked forward to for a long time, since apartment life didn't offer it.

The first week came and I was prepared, but were the recycling guys? As I stated above I had been collecting cans for quite some time. long enough that in that time we had three different people living with us on two different occasions. Had several parties, drank too many beers and ate poop loads of corn. How's that for imagery? -Pause- Okay, shake that thought. That's just crass. Ahem, okay... Where were we? Oh yeah the first week. So, with a shiny new blue green tub in hand I emptied the contents of a garbage receptacle, well as much as I could. Filled the blue green tub to the TOP with with crushed empties; Sunkist, Lone Star, Coors, Big Red, Dr. Pepper, Bud & Light, Coke & Zero, and of course the before mentioned corn (Don't think about it), green beans and such. They christened the brand spanking new blue green tub in party like fashion, all out-to the top.

This was the norm for about three weeks. My recycling crew had to have thought we were some sort of soda-beer-canned-vegetable fiesta hosters. On a weekly basis. But soon the contents of my overstuffed, crushed can devoted garbage can was empty.

Now, the only party our blue green tub hosts are those of laundry detergent & milk jugs, water bottles and the occasional wine bottle, with a few canned vegetables as the "OG's" of the party.

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.

#13: Vote in next election

Simply that... I stood in line for over TWO HOURS just to express my right to vote. I really wish there was more to it than that, but nope.

Crystal and I stood in line in downtown Buda, Texas on Main Street for over two hours. Two hours of wait time for only 5-10 minutes of booth time. Ugh! I'm just glad Crystal and I decided to eat before we stood in line, otherwise, some candidates would have missed my vote.

It's 2009! Can't they figure out a way for us to vote securely from home? Probably not in Flroida, but I think everyone else can manage.

#11: Vaccuum at least once a month

Not too much to say here. No exciting picture of me 'gettin my vaccuum' on either. Haha!
I made this a task to be done simply because I was slacking on it for too long. But now, I'm back and better than ever. That's right BETTER! Now instead of once a month I'm doin it every Sunday.

I know what you're thinking... "It's just vaccuuming." To which I say HA! I laugh at you! When it comes to me, nothing is "just" anything! When I do something it has to be melodically calculated for perfection. Yes, even vaccuuming! My belief is, if something deserves to be done it deserves to be done right and on the first go. I don't like doin anything more than it needs to be done.

And for those who are still reading this and are still thinking it's just vaccuuming, let me school you on my vaccuumin skillz! That's right, I spelled it with a Z, I keep it "clean" like that. Haha.

1. Dust from top to bottom. (Fans to blinds to decorations to table tops.)
2. Pledge to shine. Something about pledge reminds me of being a kid.
3. Remove and clean vaccuum filter.
4. Vaccuum furniture. (Not just what you can see, under coushons too!)
5. Move furniture for a complete and thorough vaccuum.
6. Hands and knees action. For the hard to reach spots get out the hose attachment and do work!
7. Put furniture back in place and admire the cleanliness.

There you have it. This sweat inducing total quality vaccuum is the thing Good Housekeeping dreams are made of.